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Place the currants in a small heatproof bowl. Pour the boiling water over the currants and set aside for 5 minutes. Drain off the water. Meanwhile, place the mayonnaise, lemon juice, vinegar, sugar, salt, and a generous amount of pepper in a large bowl and whisk to combine.
Using the shredding disk on a food processor, shred the broccoli stalks and florets. Add to the bowl of dressing. Add the currants, red onion, and almonds and toss to combine. Taste and season with more salt or pepper as needed. Let sit 30 minutes at room temperature or 1 hour in the refrigerator so the flavors can mingle before serving.